Let's Talk, A Twofold Tale

Alright everybody it’s Thanksgiving Break, unless your professors are borderline Nazis, and that means two things to me. Air travel and football. Some would loop drinking into that duo but I’m gonna merge that with football so my title works. Let’s get into it.

Air Travel

Simultaneously the best and worst way to travel, possibly even both on the same day. When flying works out, you feel like an absolute stud. You kinda walk around the airport like you’re better than the rest of the scum around you. Neck pillow guy, lady that has to take of 57 pieces of jewelry to get through TSA, and anybody that berates airline employees for their flight being cancelled/ delayed. I want to expand upon my last example. Having trouble while flying is breaking an ankle the night before you compete in the olympics. You are so close, you are three hours or less away from being home with you family and friends for the first time in months. 3 hours vs months and you can’t get there because the fucking plane is having a bad hair day then lost it’s tampon and can’t take off for 5+ hours. Fucking horse shit undeniably, but it is never the the fault of the lady working at the counter. The most extreme thing you can do is to sternly ask how the fuck you’re getting home, whether it be on a later flight or being hopped over to another airline. But losing your mind on some poor lady that’s probably making $12 an hour and gets a cavity search from TSA every other Monday is just dog shit. They hold all the power, they could just screw you 8 ways to Sunday and you want to piss them off? Bold choice, let me know how that works out. Just walk around like you own the place and tell anyone who will listen that you’re flying out to Vegas for a business conference, they’ll totally believe it.

Football

One CBC’s continuing articles is a weekly Thursday column named Lock’s of Week. Since this Thursday is Turkey day, I’m gonna give an abbreviated version of the fan favorite.

Atlanta @ New Orleans

Saints -13.5

The Saints are the best team in football, and it looks like it’s just not that close. They absolutely deleted the defending Super Bowl Champs last weekend and they looked poised to 40 in each of their last 6. The Saints defense is starting to come around so they manage to hold the Falcons to about 27-28 and Saints get an easy cover. Have fun watching this Turkey Day Shootout and take the Saints, probably the over too.

5 Michigan @ 10 Ohio St

Ohio St. - 64

I can’t believe this game is on network television. Absolutely disgraceful. The fact that a team of Ohio State’s class and integrity has to walk on the same grass as that shit stain blue team is just insulting. Coming off a gritty win over the 2nd best team in the BIG10, Maryland who is obviously better than than big blue, THE Ohio “Class” St. looks to extend their win streak in their “used to matter cause either team could win” rivalry to about 34 games. I just the Wolverines stay safe on the gridiron, because the Buckeyes are bigger, stronger, faster, smarter, better, and don’t datewomen that look like dump trucks. Gonna be a long off-season for the Big Blue after this one.

That’s all I’ve got. See y’all on the other side of Thanksgiving Eve. The biggest bar night of the year, Obviously.

-Skipper